


Sticky or: The Joys of Leaving Your Sex Life in the Hands of Sirius Black

by LucyInTheSkye



Series: Sirius x Remus [24]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Sex, Banter, Champagne, Chocolate Sauce, Felching, Food Porn, Honey, Humor, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Messy, Object Insertion, Oral Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Strawberries, Whipped Cream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-10
Updated: 2020-01-10
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:27:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22197067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LucyInTheSkye/pseuds/LucyInTheSkye
Summary: November 1979. Remus raids the fridge and Sirius teaches his boyfriend all about champagne.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Sirius x Remus [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1483745
Comments: 2
Kudos: 41





	Sticky or: The Joys of Leaving Your Sex Life in the Hands of Sirius Black

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously don't try this at home. These two can magic away potential yeast infections and whatnot.

When Remus opened the fridge the day after the full moon he was met with a surprise. 

He had been feeling like himself again, the needy invalid a thing of the past and the urge to be helpful for Sirius in return for all that he had done had made Remus volunteer to go and get beer for them both, even offer to make a sandwich for Sirius, who had stated he was feeling peckish. The voices from the muggle news prattled on and on on the telly, and Remus could hear Sirius yawning, could hear the sofa creak as he stretched.

A number of interesting products crowded their little fridge. There were raspberries and strawberries, there was ready-made chocolate sauce on bottle, there was canned whipped cream and real champagne. 

Remus stared until the muggle fridge began to beep with annoyance, urging him to just get on with it. Remus blushed, muttered out an apology (as he was wont to do, when in doubt) and filled his arms with everything in sight.

Making his way over to Sirius, who was sitting with his back to him on the sofa, the dizzying heights of his own audacity caught up with Remus, and he felt himself blush and his steps falter. Maybe this wasn’t what Sirius had been thinking of at all when he went food shopping last, maybe this was awfully presumptuous of Remus… 

“Moony, what’s in all of those mines the muggles are talking about? It looks all black, I don’t get what they’re doing with it. Is it muggle gold or something?”

Remus came to a nervous halt by Sirius’s side and dumped the contents of his arms in a jumble on the sofa table. Sirius’s eyes swished over it all; the berries, the sweet condiments, the bottle that must’ve cost more than a pretty penny, along with the jar of honey Remus had snatched from the counter, remembering a previous conversation about food and sex. Sirius finally looked up, although at that point Remus was too overcome with nerves to meet his eyes. Sirius turned off the TV.

“Accio towels,” Sirius said, quick flick of his wand, and Remus could actually hear the smirk just from his lover’s voice. 

Two large towels appeared, both thwacking Remus over the bum as they flew past, only to rearrange themselves neatly over the sofa Sirius had vacated. Sirius began stripping, and Remus chewed nervously on his bottom lip. He could do the same, but since when did his acute sense of embarrassment, his fear of rejection, his distaste for his own skin, since when did all of that ever make things easy for him? 

There was some non-verbal magic from Sirius, which turned out to be yet another warming charm (there were some potent ones in place already, fending off the onset of winter), and Remus realized that Sirius thought he was cold. Far from it, Remus was sweating with nerves.

“Let’s get you nice and naked,” Sirius said in his ear, suddenly so close they were touching, Sirius’s beautiful, naked form and Remus’s that was trying to hide inside overlarge clothes. “It’s seriously so sexy when you get hard and come to me like this.”

Remus relaxed a little, even tried out a smile directed at Sirius’s shoulder. Sirius spent a few seconds teasing Remus’s erection through his trousers, but at Remus’s piteous whine he stopped and helped him undress, instead. Remus always felt a little shy, as if it was the first time, as if he was still worried Sirius would stop half-way through and tell him his body wasn’t good enough. 

“Fucking gorgeous, you are. Sexy. Delectable. Edible.”

Remus felt his blush travel down his body, like all-consuming wildfire. He couldn’t stop looking at the food on the sofa table. Sirius took the bottle and opened the champagne with his wand, and Remus watched with mounting hunger how a couple ribbons of bubbly burst out after the cork and splashed against Sirius’s chest, one after the other. 

Sirius moaned and they both looked, admired how Sirius’s nipples hardened, how the liquid ran down Sirius’s torso, around his abs and into his navel, leaving tracks all the way to his short-trimmed pubic hair.

Sirius handed him the bottle, and Remus took a small gulp, savouring it on his tongue. He didn’t think he’d ever had real champagne before, which made this even more decadent. His first time and they would… Well. He didn’t know yet, that was one of the many joys of leaving your sex life in the hands of Sirius Black. He had a hunch that not all of this was strictly for drinking, though.

“Is it any good?” 

“I’ve no idea,” Remus admitted, handing Sirius the bottle. Sirius took a much more carefree swig, but the bubbles made big gulps difficult to drink without spilling some… Remus didn’t mind the ensuing view at all.

“It’ll do,” Sirius said, managing to sound both like a bit of a snob and very, very suggestive at the same time. He handed Remus back the bottle, then pushed him down into a sitting position on the sofa. The bubbly swirled around alarmingly, but Remus managed not to spill any. Sirius had grabbed the honey from the table. Remus swallowed, several times, his nerves getting to him. He had another careful gulp of champagne. 

Sirius unceremoniously dipped his hand into the jar, then got down on the floor between Remus’s legs, looking as nonchalant as if this was just going to be your everyday, run-of the-mill blowjob. Remus whimpered as his dick was taken by Sirius’s wet hand, smeared with thick, slow-dripping honey all over. Slow, very slow, and the liquid felt heavy, almost like a weight on Remus’s sensitive member. Sirius wanked him a couple of times, languorously, and it felt like the opposite of lube. It felt like it would be impossible to move quickly, and although it was soft and wet it was also nothing but friction, all of a sudden.

Remus had several greedy gulps from the bottle, watching with his eyes wide open. His hips were moving eagerly, his every nerve ending was on high alert. It was nice, but it was such a novel sensation that he couldn’t quite relax; at least not until Sirius bent down and applied his mouth to the sweet confection of his own making. 

“Oh, sweet Merlin, that’s nice,” Remus babbled, feeling like a string might have snapped somewhere. “Your hot, good mouth, just like that. Oh, Sirius…”

Sirius gave him a playful wink. He had just a bit more than Remus’s prickhead in his mouth, and his chin was already dripping with honey. He licked more than he sucked, slowly cleaning the honey from Remus, swallowing rhythmically like he was already drinking come. Remus was close, of course, wasn’t he always? His hips were stuttering out an increasingly irregular pace, pushing more honey over Sirius’s lips, and this really wasn’t going to take long.

Sirius put the hand that was still covered in honey on Remus’s shaft, twisting, adding some friction to the proceedings. Remus put the bottle on the floor and grabbed hold of Sirius’s face, turned it a little bit up and bent in, cradled it, watched Sirius suck. His eyes were the most beautiful thing Remus knew, and like this he could gaze into them, mere inches from his own face, as his body pushed the pedal to the floor and rushed towards climax. 

“ _Ahh_ …” Remus released, hot and heavy, and without thinking he pulled Sirius’s face further up because he needed to kiss him. Sirius laughed into his mouth while Remus shot come over his neck and collarbone, body contorted, hunched over because so many body parts wanted that delicious mouth for themselves. The honey on his lips was sweet, so sweet, almost as sweet as his laughter. 

Remus released him reluctantly, licking his own lips while analysing the odd mix of honey and semen. He leaned back, but not before he got the big bottle back, had a deep, invigorating swig, more flavours marrying in his mouth. Sirius stayed kneeling.

Sirius’s honey-covered hand took Remus’s dick again. It was sensitive, too sensitive, but then Remus’s inhuman refractory periods could be measured in seconds rather than minutes or hours, so he had some more champagne while he rode through it. Sirius’s already white neck glistened with spunk, and he turned his head to the side to emphasize it. He licked gently over Remus’s spent cock, met Remus’s heavy-lidded eyes as he continued on his mission to eat all the honey. His eyes held such confidence while he did this, while he filled his mouth with flaccid dick, and Remus wondered what it felt like to be on that end and yet to feel no embarrassment. He couldn’t even imagine it.

“Tastes good, does it?” he asked quietly. 

Sirius gave him an arrogant look and sucked hard. Remus whimpered and hugged the bottle to himself.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” 

Remus felt himself fill out again, heard a small gag from his lover. He was the one who had stuffed his mouth, had put it back in, so this was all his own fault, Remus decided. He took Sirius’s head, collected his silky hair in a fist, then pushed him until he was buried in Remus’s groin. This left Remus free to watch the rest of the collection he had brought out. He was quite eager to try something new, yet very unwilling to let go of his lover. He put down the bottle on the floor again, sensing that if Sirius had his way, then Remus would very soon lose control of his faculties. Sirius was gagging hard now, over and over, and his clenching throat was mimicking the feeling of an orgasm with some accuracy. 

“That’s it, you’re so good on your knees, just like that…” Remus bit his hand to stop himself from speaking. Then he howled into said hand, because that epic gag and choke, that drooling all over his groin, that combination seemed to be the signal his body had been waiting for. His hips thrust out madly, jerking Sirius around, but Sirius was laughing around the spasming dick and his overflowing mouth, probably because he was a bit mad himself.

“It should be criminal, how good you taste,” Sirius told him conversationally, giving Remus’s dick an affectionate peck goodbye. Remus was probably hyperventilating, or at least pulling a muscle or two in his tummy. He stared at Sirius with some disbelief, breath as ragged as ragged could be. There was a bead of come or precum, very noticeable because of the ruddy colour of the flesh underneath, and Sirius lapped it up, too. Remus squirmed.

“Maybe the honey had something to do with the quality of flavour in that meal you just had?” Remus’s voice sounded like it belonged to a mostly dead man. Certainly a very old one. Sirius sniggered and licked some come and honey off his hand.

“We could collect it in a can, sell it as a condiment. Merlin knows you make enough it could be mass produced. Bit similar to mayo, we’d say on the label, but it works with both sweet and savoury.”

Remus buried his head in his hands. Breathed in, then back out. Slowly. 

“Then again, I think I want it all for myself.”

Remus looked up shyly, smiled tentatively at his lover. Sirius’s eyes glittered like they were full of mischief, the good type, the type that would go out with a bang but that wouldn’t get you caught.

“Want to use me as a canvas?”

Remus nodded. Sirius popped a few raspberries in his mouth but then he sprawled down on the towels that covered the sofa. He had to bend his legs to fit, as Remus was still sitting on the end. Remus went for the chocolate sauce.

His hands trembled a little as he opened the bottle, and he found himself trying to read the ingredients list, to check there wasn’t anything harmful inside. Not that he’d know what might be harmful when applied to naked skin, to vulnerable, sensitive naked skin. 

Sirius’s dick was flushed and swollen, he always seemed to get hard when he gave head. 

Remus got up over him, gazed down at his stunning lover. He looked untouched, except for his mouth and his neck, but he was smiling his dirtiest smile while Remus looked him over. Remus blushed, then he poured some chocolate sauce over his nipples. 

Sirius hissed and arched his back, probably all performance but Remus felt his own bits tingle in response. The sauce was thick and almost black in colour.

Remus planted both hands firmly on Sirius’s sides, then he bent down and licked. Sirius dragged his hands through Remus’s hair while he arched his back some more, pushed his chest towards Remus’s hungry mouth. 

It was a superb combination, thought Remus, chocolate and Sirius. He sucked on the unpierced nipple, thrilled and embarrassed like he always got, but now he had good reason to suck and lick on Sirius’s nipples. Sirius moaned, drawn-out, rumbling, overwhelmingly erotic noises that Remus felt all along his spine. 

He poured more sticky sauce along Sirius’s abs, tried his best to draw a six pack on top of the real thing. It made him giggle, but the sheer fact that he was sleeping with someone who looked like this, who had actual abs, also made him fully hard. Remus’s penis would certainly never turn down an opportunity to compliment Remus’s lover on his attractiveness.

He bent down over Sirius’s stomach, held his waist in both hands, dug his nails into the firm, shapely flesh. His tongue drew a hot, messy path down the middle, spreading the chocolate around. Remus swallowed and licked his lips, watched the network of muscles intently. They clenched and unclenched, the dark sauce shiny. He licked again, and again, then kissed, mouth open and tongue still licking, his hands holding Sirius’s warm, strong middle. Sirius was undulating in small, slow movements, and his dick was leaking, leaving its sticky contribution right where the mess of chocolate ended. Remus reached for the bottle and turned it upside down, held Sirius’s gaze. Sirius was panting for real now, face hot and sweaty, mouth open and eyes very close to pleading. It made Remus feel very good indeed. He poured.

Sirius’s breath hitched and he squirmed, making the chocolate go all over the place. Heavy black ropes criss-crossed his exposed, visibly throbbing erection. Remus made a satisfied noise and put the bottle away with emphasized slowness. Sirius was trembling.

Remus bent down and licked his way up his lover’s prick. He stopped by the head, then moved back down. He was gentle and in no hurry, just eating chocolate and attempting to torture Sirius in the same way he so often had the pleasure of doing to Remus. It absolutely worked. 

“Fuck Moony, you have no idea how good that feels! Bit more and we’re golden, fucking don’t stop, _don’t you fucking dare_ … Ah, right there, your mouth and your pretty face, right there…”

Sirius’s dick twitched upwards and Remus giggled as it tapped him on the nose. It sank back down, and he watched in fascination as the whole thing spasmed, then shot out come. Heavy ropes of it, all over Sirius’s stomach and the old patterns of chocolate sauce Remus had drawn and distorted with his tongue. Remus licked him soothingly, listened to something dangerously close to a sob breaking out of his lover’s mouth.

“That felt good for you?” he asked, almost stumbling over his own words. A rare sense of pride was warming him.

“Yeah,” Sirius said hoarsely. “I fucking love you, you know that, right? Do I say it enough?”

Remus grinned and responded by reaching for the chocolate sauce and, after some hesitation, the raspberries and the whipped cream, too.

“Gonna make me into pudding?”

“I think that’d be for the best.”

Remus hesitated, wondering what to start with. There was plenty of chocolate and come on his lover, but plenty of untouched, alabaster skin with the finest dusting of dark hair. 

Remus drew a heart with chocolate sauce, over his lover’s clenching stomach and trying to hit his nipples with the rounded shapes on the top of the heart. Sirius was stretched out again, looking sated and comfortable. Remus drew a smiley face inside the heart with whipped cream, which was a lot harder than with chocolate. Apparently, it was a colder sensation too, because Sirius hissed and moved so enticingly that Remus couldn’t help but spray his dick with it too.

“Fucking hell, Lupin!”

Remus hummed happily and reached for the berries, placing raspberries along the inside of the heart. They were soft and juicy, and Remus felt his own prick twitch at the thought of rubbing it in. The last one he popped in his mouth, and Sirius pouted with his honey-sticky lips, enviously following Remus’s chewing process. Remus swallowed and licked his fingers, in what felt like a rather obvious way. He could see the mound of whipped cream over Sirius’s genitals heave.

Remus got the strawberries, which were the last men standing. Or well, second to last he thought, glancing exasperatedly at his fresh erection.

Remus took a strawberry between his fingers, a big one. He dragged it slowly through a bit of the artwork on Sirius’s chest, getting both chocolate and whipped cream on it. The whipped cream was beginning to melt, and Remus wondered if they would regret doing this on the sofa, later. He placed the strawberry teasingly just over Sirius’s face, made him use his tantalizing abs to rise up, made him stick out his tongue to reach the dripping berry, made him lick it. Remus had to grab his own dick to stop himself from coming, then had to let Sirius have his hard fought-for strawberry. Juice dripped down his chin and he moaned with satisfaction.

“Does my little slut want more?” Remus asked innocently.

“Your pretty little slut wants to eat you out, wants to be made a mess of, wants a sloppy kiss from you. Wants to be drenched in cream and come and chocolate with a cherry on top, if possible.”

“We’ll have to make do with a strawberry,” Remus said, dragging a second one over Sirius’s chest. “I haven’t been shagged for days; you know.”

“I _do_ know,” Sirius replied quickly before he bit into the strawberry. Remus pushed the bitten part into his lips, watched the red juice stain him. 

“Is it safe to…”

Remus tried to ignore the colour rising as he stared at Sirius’s dick and the mound of whipped cream that currently housed it. 

“We don’t have to, if you’re worried. But we _are_ wizards, so even if there’s a tiny tear, we can fix it easy as anything later. Won’t get to the stage of getting infected or anything.”

“I think I want to,” Remus breathed. He was so hard now, thinking about what this might feel like. He abandoned the strawberries and dragged his hand through the stickiness on Sirius’s chest, rubbing it in, blending it. 

“That’s it, make me dirty for you,” Sirius said quietly. He seemed to be happy to just watch, and Remus blushed as he dragged his hand further down, painting the smooth skin red and white and pink and dark brown. It was mostly creamy, but the raspberries added intriguing texture, and Remus kept imagining, knowing that very soon he would know. He got down to Sirius’s dick, slicked it all over. There was too much cream and he had to go back to Sirius’s upper body, had to get chocolate and dark pink lumps that he rubbed diligently all over Sirius’s shaft. 

“We should pour some into your hole too, lube it up with chocolate and cream.” 

Remus blushed furiously, had no idea how Sirius could say this stuff out loud. How he wanted it though, how he needed…

Remus rubbed his hand on the towel and planted his knees firmly on the sofa, leant his folded arms and head on the arm rest. The position was ridiculous, it would never cease to be ridiculous, but it was certainly convenient. Remus shivered as he felt a playful tongue between his cheeks, testing him out. He was used to taking it by now; had gotten used to it embarrassingly quickly in fact. It would appear his body was all for a bit of penetration, or it was as long as it was Sirius doing the penetrating. Sirius made a commending, pleased noise and gave his hole a lingering kiss. 

Next he was held open with a thumb and an index finger. Remus did his best to stay still. It was chocolate sauce, he was able to conclude, and it was poured right into him. 

“Mmm…”

Remus had to hide as his hole suddenly protested and pushed a bit of sauce out, could feel Sirius’s quiet laughter, then an eager tongue lapping at his balls.

“Cream too, Remus, what dessert would be complete without a bit of cream?”

Remus held his breath as the plastic nozzle was pushed just inside him, then a loud slurping noise and quite a lot of cold, wet pressure.

“Ahhh…”

Remus moaned and wiggled his bum, tried to get used to the feeling. 

“Strawberry on top.”

The tip of a strawberry was pushed in. Remus felt utterly humiliated, which of course meant that his already impressive erection stiffened further, began leaking as if to say it would quite like to join in the messy fun. Remus moaned softly while the strawberry was eaten out of his arse, he could hear Sirius chew and make happy noises. 

Remus squirmed, then decided to turn around, to lie down on his back with his head still on the arm of the sofa, his legs still spread for his lover. His lover who looked like he had taken a dip in a trifle.

“Still want dick, Remus?”

“Yes.”

“One dick, coming right up…”

Remus’s annoyed, would-be outrage turned into a moan that was almost a hiccough as something blunt and sticky poked his wet, full arsehole. It slid in with little effort, and Sirius laid down on him, sticky trifle between them. They kissed, mouths full of berry juice and chocolate and honey, and Remus closed his eyes and wrapped both arms and both legs around his sticky lover. Sirius rutted gently at first, in time with how his lips sucked, with how his tongue moved against Remus’s. Then the real thrusts began, the nasty slurping as he pulled out, the squelches as he pushed back into Remus’s obscenely filled hole. He could feel it pour out and down his crack, slick mess underneath his bum, but it was still more hot than gross. Clearly it was the same for Sirius, or knowing him, likely none of the gross and all of the hot. 

“I’m gonna come,” Sirius whispered, warm and wet against his cheek.

“Me too…”

They moaned in unison, stilled at almost exactly the same time. Remus had no idea if he’d come dry or not, seeing as his body was covered in dirty smears already. His orgasm was splendid, though, and in the aftershocks he began rubbing against Sirius again, rubbing his dick and riding it out, prolonging it for as long as he could. Sirius was heavy on top of him, kissing with slobbery lips that signified he was too out of it to really know what he was doing. Remus kissed him back, stayed in charge and sunned himself in the sticky sweet afterglow. 

“Don’t you usually kiss my little hole better after you’ve been in there?” Remus asked teasingly. “Clean it up, leave it the way you found it?”

Sirius gave him a sloppy kiss that mostly hit his nose, then pushed himself up on his arms. He looked exhausted, but he also looked like a man who had never backed down from a dare, not even when said dare had involved nicking Slughorn’s underwear, or taking the Giant Squid for a tour of the Great Hall in Hogwarts. Or licking his own come and an assortment of sugary condiments out of someone else’s arsehole.

“Let’s see it, then. Show me your sweet little hole.”

Remus spread his legs wider, and Sirius pushed his thighs towards his head. He was watching, looking at Remus’s most vulnerable and private place, and he was grinning like Christmas had come early.

Remus held his legs and looked up at the ceiling. Sirius had painted it gold in a fit of excess energy, and neither of them had bothered to change it back to its previous, more neutral white. He felt the tongue, but it was cleaning up his balls, the insides of his thighs, his whole crack first. Apparently the whole area was in a bit of a state.

“You know you don’t have to,” Remus said placatingly, to combat the guilt that rose to the surface so easily for him. Sirius huffed and pushed his tongue into Remus’s used, overflowing hole. Remus saw stars, maybe one in particular. He strained his neck, but he couldn’t see Sirius’s face from this angle. His body was full of colour, though.

There was filthy suction, a lot of tongue, lots of licking and kissing. Remus’s exhausted dick was pointing at him, he thought it looked as if it was glaring, straight at him, one-eyed though it might be. This was the sort of stimulation it couldn’t ignore, no matter how tired and sore, but Remus had no intention of asking Sirius to stop. 

“You’ve got such a naughty little hole I’m almost tempted to flush it out with some of that bubbly,” Sirius said. He had risen to be able to look at Remus, and Remus’s dick waved a little in greeting as they caught sight of each other.

Remus swallowed, he was growing tingly and nervous all over.

“Like we did with the beer?” he asked.

“Just a suggestion. We can hit the shower, too.”

“The bubbly. The champagne,” Remus corrected, wincing as realization hit. He was going to have _real champagne_ fucked into his…

“You’re becoming such a debauched little tart that you barely need me to show you where the gutter is, anymore,” Sirius told him with a grin. Remus shook his head, feigned chastisement as well he could. You might say he was in no position to pull it off.

Sirius swiped the bottle from the floor, brought it to his mouth first and gulped some down. At this stage it really didn’t matter if he spilt any on himself. He had a quick look at it after, ran his thumb along the rim of the bottle. Seemingly satisfied, he put the bottle to Remus’s mouth next, and Remus had some small sips while he gazed timidly into Sirius’s eyes. Sirius was holding the bottle steady, making sure not to pour too much at once into his mouth. 

“Ok.”

“Ok,” Sirius repeated. He took a careful hold of Remus’s legs, pushed them up almost to his head. Remus got very red in the face. Sirius put the bottle to his crack, tilted it slowly until he could push it in.

“Mmm…” 

Remus didn’t know what to say, and instead of words or more moans he giggled a little. It felt funny, this assault of cool bubbles pushing in. They couldn’t go very far, it seemed, and Remus doubted he would feel much cleaner after this. The slim neck of the bottle rubbed gently, almost comfortingly against the walls of his hole, and his overworked, sloppy rim was valiantly trying to clench around it, too. Sirius smiled softly at him, then bent down and kissed him all around where the champagne bottle was fucking into him.

“Take it out and drink,” Remus suggested, making his voice small just in case he would get a ‘no’. Who was he kidding, as if Sirius would ever want to tell him ‘no’?

Sirius took his suggestion right away. He made the swap almost seamlessly. A little champagne spilled over Remus’s balls and dick, down his contorted torso, but mostly it was sucked out of his hole by Sirius’s talented, thirsty mouth which latched onto his rim like they were long-lost Siamese twins. Sirius took Remus’s dick in hand too, and this time it felt more like massage than like wanking off. Remus watched the kissing and the slurping, then the perverted licking as Sirius scooped up what he could. 

“Bit sore, now…” Remus finally had to say, despite how much he enjoyed it, despite how gentle it had all become. 

Sirius stopped, eased his body down carefully on the sofa. Remus did not dare look at the state of the towels they had laid down before they started.

“Want me to suck that?” Sirius asked and gestured to the erection on Remus’s belly. Remus wrinkled his nose.

“Maybe in the shower if it hasn’t gone down till then.”

“Why on earth would we want to shower?” Sirius asked with a wink. Remus raked his eyes pointedly over his body. He was happy he couldn’t see the state of his own behind right now. 

Sirius looked down and scooped up the mushed remains of a raspberry from underneath his nipple. He licked it noisily off his fingers.

“Does your skin feel good inside, love?”

Remus blushed and nodded.

“Doesn’t feel like there’s any tears?”

“No. Did it look bad? On the inside, I mean…” Remus blushed even more, but then Sirius probably had seen a fair bit of his insides, was bound to the way he kept pushing his face in there.

“Nah. I mean it looked as if you had bloody diarrhoea, but that was the chocolate and whipped cream and raspberry combo, I’m sure.”

“Fucking gross,” Remus whispered, feeling utterly horrified. Sirius grinned raunchily at him.

“Fucking delicious is what it was.”

“You’ll never be able to convince me of that.”

“More dessert for me, is all I’m hearing. Your hole warms it up nicely, too.”

“Now you’re making me nauseous,” Remus grumbled.

“Give us a kiss,” Sirius suggested, jokingly making kissy noises and pursing his lips, eyes fluttering closed. 

Remus leant in and kissed him, which turned out to be the only way to shut him up. Remus grinned into the surprised ‘o’ of his mouth and felt like he had won, all things considered.


End file.
